Arrivederchi
by dark mikohanyou
Summary: South Italy is tired of everyone loving his brother and forgeting about him. He has given up but wants everyone to know how he truly feels. Warning character death, suicide
1. Italy's Letter

**AN: hey guys, sorry I haven't been posing anything recently, school got in the way. I really hope you like the new story; I will be adding each person's part of the note as a new chapter so they should be up soon. I wrote this part for my English class so it's much more censored that the rest of the story will be. Well enjoy I guess!**

Someday someone will love me

Someday someone will love me

Someday someone will Screw it!

Maybe someday someone will love me, it's too bad that I would live long enough to meet them. I'm tired of it all, the teasing, the joking, and the comparisons. Everyone sees me as the worthless older version of Feliciano, that can do anything right. Always telling me that I souls be nicer or cuter, but I'm not my brother. I was raised to be wary of others and to never get too close to anybody, how is that my fault! But I guess you all never took the time to find any of this out.

Fratello-

Please don't be upset by this, it was only a matter of time. I want you to know that you were the one thing that kept me alive as long as I have been. Family has always been the most important thing in the world to me and you are the only family I have left. You have almost always been there to listen to my problems, even if you didn't always understand them. But recently you have been pulling away from me. I know that I'm not the center of your world like you are mine. That's okay, I'm not mad. You have always been able to make friends so much easier than me. Even though I hate some of the people you hang out with, like that damn potato eater, I still want you to have tons of friends. After you started pulling away and didn't seem to want anything to do with me anymore I turned to Antonio, but it just wasn't the same. Much like you he had other people ne care more about. Please don't blame yourself for this; it's not your fault. It's mine for being this this useless waste of space that no longer has a place in this world. I'm so sorry that I couldn't be the brother you deserved, and that in response you couldn't love me. This is goodbye brother; maybe we will see each other again one day.

Arrivederci,

Lovino Vargas


	2. Spain's letter

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia!**

Antonio -

Hey bastardo stop crying and stop blaming yourself for this. I know you never could have loved me the same way I loved you, it's impossible.

You were a bright ray of light in this fucked up world and I was just another screwed up shadow wishing to bask in your light. Good that sounded mushy, see what you've done to me idiota!

Ti Amo Antonio, I always have. I fell in love with you when I was just a small child when I first came to live with you. You were the only person who had ever given a crap about me other than my Fratello. Even when I was rude and yelled you continued to smile and say you loved me. I truly thought you cared but then I overheard you trying to trade me back with my brother to that fucking piano humper!

You never saw how much that hurt me, or how that day proved that no one would ever love me more than my brother. Thanks bastardo, you saved me a whole hell of a lot of time and heartache trying to get you to love me.

Look after you read this go out to the bar with your dumb ass friends and get piss ass drunk. Then in the morning forget all about me and move on with your life. That's is if you're even sad about this. I doubt you are though, after all I was nothing more to you than your old henchman.

Take care of Feliciano for me and keep on smiling and being the stupid asshole your are.

Arrivederci,

Ti Amo, Lovino Romano Vargas


	3. Lovino says goodbye

**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia or any of its characters. only the plot line ... the plot line is mine!**

Lovino sighed looking down at the notes he had written and quickly placed them in their envelopes before he could talk himself out of it. He then stood up and walked out of the kitchen heading in the direction of the bathroom. The bathroom had always been his safe room, and it contained his art supplies. Even though he knew he wasn't as good as his brother, when he became sad he would paint his own arms with his own blood. The feeling of physical pain always distracted him from the thoughts floating through his head, if only for a little while. Soon after the self-hatred would reappear and the words of his peers would float back into his head.

He had considered just shooting himself and getting it over with quickly but he changed his mind, he couldn't die without painting one last time, and so he decided that he would just cut a little deeper and end his pain for good. After he collected the razor from its cabinet he hurried back to the kitchen and sat down on the floor with his back against the wall.

He smiled sadly at the room and took a last look around before raising the razor to his wrist and slashing deeply into his skin. Wincing in pain he traded off the razor to his other hand and repeated the movement on the other wrist. After several cuts were created, each deeper than the last, Lovino finally laid down his razor and allowed his eyes to slip shut.

He began to feel light headed and tried to stand up and grab a tomato before he lost his footing and slid back down to the floor. Giving up on his last snack the young man slumped down the wall and closed his eyes again. As he felt the last seconds of his life slip away he thought that his only regret was not seeing the man he loved one last time.

With a final sigh Lovino breathed his last breath and silence reigned in the house. If only he had waited a couple more minutes he would have heard the silence broken by a happy voice calling out his name coated with a lovely spanish accent, and he would have heard the agonized shout of his name as his best friend walked into the kitchen.

But it was too late and Lovino was gone, overwhelmed and drowned by his own pain.

**A/N: sorry for the long wait guys. I have the next part written up I just need to get it typed! tell me what you think and if you all want the rest of it. anyway R and R guys :)**


	4. Reactions

Antonio smiled as he walked down the road to his former henchman's house. He hadn't had a chance to talk to the younger man in almost two months, so the moment he had free time he flew off to surprise him. Although he would not admit it, often times not even to himself, Antonio had been in love with Lovino for years and was always happy to spend time with him despite his normally cross and off putting personality.

He quickly walked the last few feet to Lovino's doorstep, pulling out his key and throwing the door open gleefully. As he walked into the foyer he called out the younger man's name and headed towards the kitchen, hoping to steal one of the boy's delicious home grown tomatoes. As he walked through the door he froze in shock, forgetting his original mission as he stared at the still bleeding body of the boy he loved. Screaming out his name in anguish he raced to the body, going that by some miracle the young man might still be alive, and that he could save him. He sunk to his knees and pulled the boy into his arms, the tears leaving his eyes at a faster rate as when he discovered he was only moments to late. Lovino's body was still warm but he could feel the cold quickly setting into the lifeless body.

_Oh God why did you do this Lovino! Why! What drove you to this! I love you, please come back! I need you to come back! _

These thoughts raced quickly through his head as he clutched the young body closer to him, never minding the blood that was steadily soaking into his clothing.

A noise caught his attention and he looked up, relaxing when he realized that it was only a tree branch hitting the window. Sighing he turned his head and noticed the envelopes sitting on the kitchen table. Reluctantly standing he made his way over and quietly picked up the letter with his name on it. As he read more silent tears poured down his face, and finally a sob broke free.

Suddenly he couldn't stand being in the kitchen anymore, the smell and sight of Lovino's blood driving him crazy. He slowly walked to the living room and fell back onto the couch, almost falling asleep, if not for the entrance if another person. In his confused state all he noticed was the thin curl that protruded from the boys head and was about to call out if the other man hadn't beat him to it. Feliciano gave a surprised shout and ran to the Spaniards side.

_Oh God Tonio, what's wrong! Are you hurt? Why are you bleeding! We have to get help! Doitsu, Doitsu!_

The words escaped the younger Italian quickly but a shake of Antonio's head effectively due him up.

_Not my blood. Go look in the kitchen. _

He winced slightly as he watched the boy nod happily and skip towards the kitchen. The next thing he heard was the young man's shrill cry of his brother's name and suddenly he found himself with an armful of crying Italian. Feliciano was babbling a mile a minute and sobbing uncontrollably. In response tears returned with a vengeance to the Spaniards eyes and the two men cried themselves to sleep in each other's arms.

**A/N: okay well this will probably be the last installment of this story, although if I lose the horrid case of writers block I have I may update more. we shall see I guess. please R&amp;R I love to hear y'all's feedback.**


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